Hang My Head, Drown My Fear Till You All Just Disappear

Almost four years ago I went to a Soundgarden show. It was the first time the band came to Mexico City. They just had released King Animal and they were touring the album. Even though I didn't like it at all, I wouldn't miss the opportunity to hear one of my favorite bands playing live music in my country. 

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I bought a couple of tickets as soon as I could. Besides Nirvana, Soundgarden was the band I heard the most when I was a teenager. I particularly didn't like that they sounded more like a heavy metal band than a garage punk band -as it is the case of Ultramega OK and Badmotorfinger-, but eventually, I loved them. 

The first Soundgarden's song I heard was Black Hole Sun and it blew up my mind, immediately. It must have been in the middle of the summer in 1994, shortly after USA's World Cup. Cobain just had died and it was impossible to avoid thinking of him, while hearing the song. The video was awesome and violent. Then, I watched Fell On Black Days' video and I just adored it. Later, Jesus Christ Pose and so on. 

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In a few years, I went from Superunknown to Badmotorfinger -it was the easiest way to find their music-, just about time to hear Down On The Upside when it came out. 

I was  17 years old when the band announced their break. Never thought I would hear them playing live music, but after almost 20 years since their last studio album they recorded King Animal and announced a World Tour. 

It was an awesome show. I was euphoric. Felt I was a teenager, too. 

Chris Cornell just died today. 

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Black Hole Sun

Try To Erase This From The Blackboard

“Sometimes I wish I could fall asleep”, Tania said. 

“Excuse me? You slept the entire night!”, I screamed.

“Honestly, I believe you need to give a fuck, if you really want things to happen”, she said, as if we were in the middle of another conversation. She used to change topics in the very same way kittens look at any moving object. Her eyes explored the entire bedroom.

“What do you mean, dear?”, I asked her. 

“You know... like when you really don't want things to happen, and, actually, they don't...”, she murmured. Her eyes stopped at the corner of the bedroom. A spider was climbing up the wall.

“I don't follow you, so far”, I complained.

“C'mon! I don't believe you...! But, for instance, when you really want something to happen and it never happens... and the opposite, when you don't care about something and then it happens sooner than you'd ever imagined...”, was her confusing answer.

I had a coughing attack and I got exhausted. For a moment, I thought I was about to vomit and to hyperventilate and to get paranoid once again.

Stronger Than All

I was 13 years old. My younger brother heard Pantera on a daily basis. A friend of him, introduced him to the band. It was the summer of 1994. The band sounded violent and faster than any other band I heard before. I used to saw I'm broken on TV, almost every other day. Even though I liked them, never thought someday I would attend to a Pantera show. 

It was a rainy evening, on July 1997 at El Palacio De Los Deportes, when Pantera came to Mexico City, for a second time. A few months before, they had been the opening act for Kiss in the same venue. 

Obviously, my brother was a big fan of the band -I wasn't, at all-, but he was not interested in school and he had bad notes, so our parents didn't allow him to go to the show. 

I was there, with a friend of mine. He said he liked Pantera, but he also liked Sepultura, Ugly Kid Joe, Metallica, Skid Row, Kiss, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Guns N' Roses, basketball and beer. My friend was sort of a poser, but it was funny to hang out with him. He really looked like a heavy metal fan. He had long hair in a punk style, he always dressed shorts and the infamous I Hate Myself And I Want To Die t-shirt which everybody wore short after Cobain's death. 

That evening, Anthrax and Makina played, too. It was a really violent and intense show. At some point, it started to rain and the water began to seep through the roof. It was funny and refreshing. 

Also, when Pantera came out to the stage, people drove wild and began to smash chairs and stuff like that. I don't know who thought it was a great idea to put chairs for the audience in a show like that. It was silly. People started to steal merchandise, too. T-shirts, beers, food... anything you can imagine. 

I kinda felt out of place, but the disaster was so contagious. 

Never thought Dimebag Darrell would die in such an awful way, some years later.